Let the handless games begin
The World Cup starts tomorrow.  I'm excessively ready.  I watched Greece get eliminated from Cup qualifications in October, and since then I've vaguely been watching Champions League play.  (I'm so happy Thierry Henry lost.)  Recently, I've been reading far too much cup coverage.  I'm ready.
Who am I rooting for?  Well, obviously the U.S.  If sports can't breed nationalism, what's the point?  Sadly, America can't play all the games--if they're lucky, they'll get more than three.  So, I need other teams.  Qualifications for my fandom: I must have visited your country, and your national population must be less than 58 million.
So, I am rooting for, in chronological order with odds in parentheses:
Ecuador (195-1):  They're nicknamed "La Tri" and have a striker named "Bam Bam."  YouTube has a 10-minute video about the team.
Spain (14-1): "The Furious Red."  One of their players has a wicked fauxhawk mullet.
Sweden (36-1): They're nicknamed <td></td><td>Blågult, which really doesn't roll of the tongue.  I think it means "Blue Gold."  Their goalkeeper just got injured, but their petulant superstar, the incomparably named Zlatan Ibrahimovic (so Swedish), can juggle gum.  It touches his cleats, and he keeps on chewing.  Eew.
</td>The Netherlands (14-1): They might actually win.  They're nicknamed Oranje.  The Germans think they're terrible at foosball.  And, sadly, their first game is against...
Serbia and Montenegro (80-1):  The nation of S&M (actually SCG not S&M or SCM) doesn't exist anymore, so root for them if you enjoyed rooting for the Allied of Confederate States in the Olympics oh so many years ago.  They're really good at defense.  Continuing the nickname trend, they're the Blues (Plavi).  They just destroyed Austria, which, given their history, probably feels good.  They score goals with the help of pop music.  And are_sea_eye_el lives there.
Croatia (62-1): Their checkered jerseys are mildly fascist.  They're nicknamed "The Fiery Ones," and their fans like lighting fires.  According to The Guardian, they're "technically brilliant but psychologically brittle macho men" and employ a 1-2-4-1-2 formation.  yeah.  And Croatia is the birthplace of the necktie, and possibly the Dalmatian dog breed.

Beyond that, I'll generally root for the underdog, and the non-European nations.  My most hated teams are, in order: Germany (for 2002), England, Brazil (for beng too good), Italy (for breaking my heart in 1994), France, and since their in the U.S.'s group, the Czech Republic.
For better information, go to Deadspin.  Also, if you want to try to predict who'll win the games, go to Deadspin's ESPN tourney.  I'm there, as reportingfromgreece.  You can also join my own personal pool.
USA! Ecuador! Spain! Sweden!  The Netherlands! Serbia!  Croatia!